As I have written in these journals, I am an alcohol-addicted guy therefore have been quitting it for nine years completely. As you might know, addiction is a serious problem in this society - Besides alcohol, you can find various addictive things such as work, drugs, and the internet. About this topic, I can't be so proud because I still have an addictive mind and therefore can't stop buying too expensive things without thinking carefully.
When I started quitting alcohol, all I had thought about was just how I would be able to live a better life which must have its precious value. Eventually, this issue has guided me toward topics such as how I can maintain my will properly and not drink anymore. Some friends say that I must have a strong will as iron, but as I have written above my will is so weak actually. I am a weak, imperfect guy - this idea had been born in my mind at a certain point in my personal life.
TBH, even though I started quitting alcohol actually, somewhere in my mind I wanted to deny the possibility of being alcohol-addicted. I couldn't accept it... But why? Maybe because if I accept that fact, I need to accept that I must be so weak literally that I can't control my drinking.
At that time, I must have been possessed by the silly idea (or obsession) that made me behave as a strong, masculine individual. Therefore, simply I misunderstood something seriously - Be strong, and be independent enough. Yes, stand-alone to live alone without any help. That was the only ideal in my immature mind. Oh, what a stupid, sad idea. But, that was an episode of mine.
Recently, I have been attracted to the concept of conservativism which means that we are all so imperfect that we can make mistakes. Therefore, we shouldn't believe in our smartness too much, and we must learn various traditional resources in our society. When I was young, I had been attracted to radical ideas. But now, I like this conservativism... This must be surely one of the treasures quitting alcohol has afforded to me I guess, even though I had not expected that... But c'est la vie.
