BGM: Pat Metheny - Phase Dance
Today was a day off. I am really forgettable because of the sad autistic character. I often forget the promises or do "double booking". Today was the day I would write the e-mail I promised sending it to my job coach, and I used the reminder function of Google Keep so could write it certainly. I wrote the troubles I have at the workplace as honestly as possible. I am really poor at making lies (but I sometimes try to make lies as you know), so I confessed all of my troubles to her because it would work easily later. And how it will work? Once (as I wrote yesterday) I couldn't nothing if these kinds of troubles happened, so I thought "I am far from those days". "The meeting about autism" I always attend brings me the encountering with that job coach, and also the trial I started to live this life cleverly as an autistic person. Life goes on.
After I wrote that e-mail, I read Haruki Murakami's "Murakami Radio". Suddenly, I thought about myself. I have been influenced to start listening to Jazz by Haruki Murakami, and I thought that I am the person who tries to "adapt myself to the environment". In other words, I won't try to change the environment, but try to adapt it. Of course, it can have good points and bad points, but my life might be said as "I work hardly to make it work good". That might be me. About this job, people often said "you should quit it". Me, I thought quitting this again and again, but I couldn't do that so felt sick. TBH, now I think that if I could use my skill of English as my job. But my body seems adapted to my work and I am still doing. If I were at the situation of the movie "The Martian", I would try to survive that severe situation with a lot of disco songs.
Talking about music, I remember that my life has been helped by music by now. Even now, this morning, the time I wonder what to do certainly, I choose Stevie Wonder to ease my mind. I also listen to Pizzicato Five who tells and embrace me as saying "Tomorrow is another day". When I start work, the soundtrack of the movie "Pulp Fiction" helps me. And also, James Brown's power give me a certain strength... like that, music is standing by me. When I was a kid, a Japanese pop duo PSY・S' song "Lemonの勇気" "shot" through me, and from that accident I have walked this life with music like this. Probably, even I become the age of retirement, I would listen to the unplugged by Eric Clapton or Bob Dylan. If you get older, you would become childlike... At last, I have never experienced any romance and became this age. Without dream and roman... What a life.
I found that we can listen to the masterpieces by De La Soul through subscription, so I listened to their "Stakes Is High" and made a draft for the meeting on the next Thursday. About aphorism. If I did too serious "lecture", the members would not be able to enjoy from their heart. I tried to make it humorous. I quoted Haruki Murakami and Woody Allen, but I also tried to google and find Japanese famous TV personalities' quotes. This is the quote I could learn by googling, for example, that Yogi Berra, a baseball player said “You can observe a lot by just watching”. It's really Zen. I try to add Shigeo Nagashima's quote, a legendary Japanese baseball player. "I want Matsui to show more aurora" (of course, it should be "aura"). Or a famous Japanese TV host, Tamori's "If you have no confidence, you should say it loudly" is also interesting. I spent my day like that.
