I worked late today. I attended a Zoom meeting this morning to enjoy chatting in English as usual. There, we talked about the earthquake in Japan (one of the members came to join that meeting from Miyazaki prefecture, but he said you needed not worry because it was alright). After that meeting and also having breakfast, I faced the canvas an artist friend had given me to draw my painting. Still, I got too nervous about drawing anything (or only drawing one line), so finally, I gave up.
Courage... Probably that must be the one I need. I remember a book that said you should have courage enough which "almost" enables you to crush that canvas. Yes, I learned that could be true this morning. I should remember my primitive, instinctive passion which certainly drives me to crush that canvas. Anyway, today I could do completely nothing at all in the process of drawing.
Anyway after I gave up drawing, I went to AEON to spend my morning time with one book, Yoshio Kataoka's "Living Through Languages [片岡義男『言葉を生きる』]". Reading that book, I thought about how I could draw my own pic (a friend taught me an interesting word, "doodling". Yes, mine will be exactly a result of a trial of doodling). I can't draw any illustrations such as beautiful manga or anime. However, when I spilled this trouble to a friend who is also an artist, he embraced me as I shouldn't hurry up about this. I can make many trials and errors until the deadline.
I can't tell you the reason why... But, after I got that text on Messenger, I tried to name my pic (as I have written above, all I have is just a canvas painted in blue only). And also, I sent many messages to my friends about this (in English, and also in Japanese). Then, suddenly the Spotify of my smartphone started playing Yellow Magic Orchestra's evergreen song "Tong Poo", and it made me think about my pic more deeply enough. In other words, that song has inspired me.
TBH, recently another friend of mine sent me a message that said to me that I was so calm, and that had helped that person a lot. Of course, I am glad to hear that. However, as you already read, according to today's record my mind or consciousness seems very confused, or simply scattered at all!
