I had a day off. This morning, after the daily English Zoom meeting, I went to AEON. Although I could stay in my room and do nothing special (because, as I have written already, I am working during this New Year season), I wasn't able to stay calm in my room because of this hyperactive (very ADHD) character. There, I read the Hikaru Okuizumi's mystery work "The 'I am a Cat' Murder Case [奥泉光『「吾輩は猫である」殺人事件』]". I found this book to be a very impressive, brainy masterpiece which contains certainly various "delicious" essences of literature such as traditional mystery, sci-fi, and mainstream literature.
This afternoon, I chose not to do anything special as I have written above, and just had lunch in my room and stayed calm. The mystery book by Okuizumi tells us that how people in the ancient era (about 100 years ago) lived in their lives. A war (or a conflict) had happened, and also they dreamed how to improve their lives with each person's precious, unique motivation. So-called "political revolutions", romance, and innovations. How can I have that kind of innovative, positive ambitions?
My dream, my ambition, or my resolution... About this issue, you shouldn't trust me seriously because my moods can be changed so easily. Although I had decided to read Souseki's works mainly during this year, this afternoon I read a Japanese legendary critic, Jun Etoh's essay about Souseki. I found that an English author, Jane Austin, had influenced Souseki. Therefore, I have added Jane Austin's masterpieces such as "Pride and Prejudice" to my own "to read" list in my mind.
After that, I just opened (literally, like netsurfing across the web), various books and released my mind onto them. What will I be able to do this year? I will be 50, and even start thinking that my life's "next chapter" can start (even though I can't tell how many chapters already passed until now). Once, I wished I could die beautifully (in a way, like a sort of splendid legendary death I could ever wish) like Kafka who had passed away in his 40. However, now I believe that I should survive until the end something sublime has ordered me, like Souseki told us within his works.
