BGM: Manic Street Preachers - Everything Must Go
When I was a high school student, although now I have forgotten how this word had been mentioned within its context, I had certainly read the word "grief work" from Ryuichi Sakamoto's essay. Now, after the news of my friend's had passed away, I often remember this word. It says we shouldn't try to get recovered from any sorrow if we feel really painful in our emotions because of the separation with anyone. We just have to try to feel that sorrow as deeply as we can at first, and then we can find the clue to become better.
Today I worked late. This morning, I went to AEON to read something at my free time. But I couldn't concentrate any pages of books, so I decided to give up and started writing my memo as usual. Even now, I had been caught by the friend's death... But anyway, I have to live on the life. I need to move my fingers to type this journal, instead of staying within the sorrow.
Japanese culture/language has an interesting word. It's 日にち薬 (if I try to translate it literally, it can be "time medicine".) This means that the passing time, the process of spending time with enduring the damage certainly can ease your mind. For me, this word/concept is also telling me about the same thing as "grief work". Slowly, step by step, I need to get better from the damaged state of mind.
At 5pm, having a break time at my workplace, I suddenly remembered the novel I have read many times. It's Haruki Murakami's "Norwegian Wood", which I have read about 10 times by now. This novel has taught me about how the separation with any intimate person can be (mainly, because of passing away.) When I read this novel in my high school life, I had been impressed by its elegant melancholy. Since that period, about 30 years has been passing. How can it change?
I remember a Japanese writer's quote which says "even though you lose your most important/beloved person, you will have dinner." Yes, I am alive so I need to have something to my mouth to live. Life goes on... and I remember a funny expression I love. "Everything must go."
