BGM: Electronic - Feel Every Beat
It was a day off today. This morning I had felt slightly depressed, therefore I could do nothing. I needed to change my mood so went to the library, and found two interesting books at there. "The Genetic Lottery" and "The Future is History". I borrowed them, and I could feel better again. What a simple mind.
With The Smiths' bangers (especially the ones in "The Queen is Dead",) I started reading "The Genetic Lottery". Yes, this world must be a result of inequality as this book has taught us (although I just read only its beginning part.) For example, I am a human being (what would it become if I were a tree? etc.) and I am male. I can add many things to this list. I am (as I have said many times) autistic, a pervert, Japanese, an English learner, etc. Therefore I have to live this life with thinking these factors as a kind of given, already decided limits about myself. They must not be able to be changed (at least, they are really difficult to be changed.)
About this, I always remind of "The Serenity Prayer." Especially, I must need the courage to accept the things I can't change. And... I want to add this. I also need the courage to change myself if I can do so, because (as an autistic person) it is often so difficult for me to do so. Therefore, I need to read books to learn the true shape of myself (in other words, the limit of imagination of myself by reading difficult ones.) By learning that shape, I can get tenderer to myself and others. That's an idea of the spirit of "liberalism."
This evening, I've read Hiroki Azuma's new one (東浩紀『訂正する力』.) This book is also telling me about that kind of "the courage" for me (in my opinion or as my personal reading, of course.) This title says "the power/ability of re-correcting ourselves." It must need the truly "critical" cool mind and a warm heart (this Azuma must have both.) Could I have them? I can't see...
Like this, I have read really complicated, difficult books. For me, it's just for fun (although I accept that I have done that for killing boredom, too.) Yes, this life is for me to enjoy.
