Back To Life

Back To Reality

2022/03/10 English

Today I thought of an idea suddenly while eating lunch at the cafeteria of my workplace. "What is the reality?". Yes, "What does 'reality' mean?"... I remember a book. Yoshimichi Nakajima's "The textbook of philosophy" says about the singularity of the reality of 'now' by quoting Sartre's "Nausea". It is never any difficult argument. The scenery I can see from here 'now'... For example, at this moment I'm writing a journal using my computer which is in front of me with Ryuichi Sakamoto's music. These are the real for me 'now'. In Rei Nagai's "The philosopher in water", Sartre appears as an important philosopher too. I should read Sartre? Then I should choose "Nausea"?

In my work, I thought about the novel I want to write. Of course, just only having an idea that I want to write leads not produce any novel. I just have to do it. More simply, "write it before saying any excuses". But I can't see where I should start from, so I thought if Yoshio Kataoka's novels give me any clues and I borrowed his short novels "and she said so" by a library after the work. Don't think too seriously... If I write it, then I thought about the mystery and profound truth of the world I can see clearly 'now' as I wrote above.

The night, I have an opportunity of listening to the story of a female friend in Kyoto as a member of a meeting. There I talked about the difference between English and Japanese with instant knowledge. English is the language in that we make sentences using Lego bricks. and Japanese is like slimes that we connect them as sentences. I have come far from the time... when I had learned English, learning it means just a hard job. I could find no positive meaning and just felt as a duty. Now I can grip the meaning and so I am trying to learn. That's life?

After that, I used clubhouse and joined a room that a woman who lives in Chicago, and who is bilingual in Japanese and English, opened as a host. There I enjoyed a game using Japanese and English. My English is not really good. At least, I can't represent what I want to tell enough and also I say random things if I try to speak longer. But I speak with one more step and get embarrassed following Inoki's message. Today I enjoyed talking English too. Trying to speak smartly without getting any wounds, never goes well (at least, in my case). I just think of it as 'It's OK'. Yes, It's OK!