It was a day off. This morning, I found an interesting discussion on Discord about how we could build our so-called "self-esteem" in our minds. Yes, this must be an everlasting theme for us... In my case, when I was very young (in particular, in my early 20s when I was a college student), I couldn't find any good essence in myself, therefore I had to feel a huge, beast-like inferior complex in my mind and just being withdrawn from the outer world.
At 40 when I met my job coach (and also, quit my alcohol anymore), the coach recommended that I should restart learning English again, and even introduced me to the International Association in our city. Through that, I started doing it again. Probably that trial of learning English has brought me this clear, firm self-esteem certainly within me.
Yes, the process of learning English must have worked for me as a process of remembering/finding my shape/limit of mind, within what I have been thinking as my interest. Little by little, and definitely as an actual process, I have been building the person who is now typing this text (the text which probably must have a too-proudful sound). I feel I can understand the people's frustration who can't find any self-esteem in their minds, and just suggest this: how about starting your favorite/interested trial you want to do from the bottom of your mind?
At least, for me even now I can find pleasant feelings when my poor (LITERALLY poor) English seems to deliver the exact meaning I have had in my mind, and I even say that that can be a tiny but precious success moment for me. I won't say that EVERYONE must learn English. This is just a case, and this long, personal episode concludes that you would be able to receive from the world this kind of tiny, but certain success with the activities you have been loving to do.
This afternoon, I went to the main house of my group home to see the people to discuss my job, and also the job coaches of mine. After that issue, we talked about the picture I had drawn before. Also, on Discord, some friends praised that painting (they even asked me about that with their keen interest!). This must be an unbelievable, and also very pleasant gift for me.
