Today I had a day off. This morning, I couldn't sleep well even though I had taken some pills for sleeping as usual. On the bed, I tried to sleep again but this summer is a little bit too hot even though it was morning time, therefore all I could do was lay my body on that (my autism didn't let me stay calm). Although I tried to write this journal instead of making a wasteful effort to sleep again, I couldn't do so. Anyway, the morning came and I had to get out of bed. At last, I had to quit attending this morning's Zoom meeting in English.
As I had reserved before, I went to the hospital in this town to see my doctor and talked about my autism. But as I have written above, my mental condition was really, literally "messed up" and so couldn't tell how I had been suffering as well. After that "poor" meeting, I got some medicines as usual. Remembering this, I feel that meeting with the doctor has been becoming a sort of "routine work" for me.
I saw the admin and the sub-admin of my group home this afternoon. There, we discussed how I should tell my condition to the doctor, and these admins said to me that they would make some papers which contained a kind of chart. Into that chart, I can write my schedule (when I wake up, have breakfast, go out of the apartment, etc). About this, I naturally feel that their kindness toward me must be so great.
Returning to my apartment, I just tried to stay still without doing anything completely. I just opened some books' pages and "saw" into them with a relaxed mood (you would feel this strange, but I tried not to concentrate on those books, and just tried to escape from this world). After having dinner, I opened the tool Discord but nothing came to the surface of my consciousness.
One thing I have to remember... on Discord, I met a person who said they were a Japanese girl. However, their Japanese seemed to me very awkward like being done by any machine translator. Therefore, another user there pointed out how they could be suspicious. Now, I guess they (probably he) could be a sort of "catfish". Whether or not, I should be careful about this possibility, and not be "tempted" so easily/carelessly.
