I worked late today. This morning, I went to AEON's food court to enjoy reading Yoshio Kataoka's book "Outside of the Japanese language [片岡義男『日本語の外へ』]" a little. In this book, Kataoka tells us what difference between the English language and the Japanese one can have. His style is very clear, therefore I have been impressed by his brilliant analysis of that.
I remember my past bittersweet memories... and find this. Certainly, when I use English to express my thoughts, they tend to become more crisp/clear, or in a way more open-source-like. I can't tell this feeling clearly enough you, but as my impression, by using English my ideas start having their own clear shapes. In Japanese (yes, my mother tongue which can be so instinctive) everything has been connected to me so closely/tightly. But through the process of putting them into English, I can find the main cores of them within my mind. Sorry! It must be too complicated.
When I start using English in the English conversation classes (or on Discord, or Zoom meetings, etc...), I naturally notice that my mind becomes open enough to declare/show my "flag" in public. Of course, in a way that means I tend to lose Japanese precious shyness actually (don't accept this as an irony). Therefore, I can never judge/tell which is greater ultimately (or I should say I shouldn't do so). However, although it must sound very paradoxical, the more I have learned English, the more I have learned what the Japanese language's core can be.
When I use the Japanese language (within the gravity of the Japanese way of thinking), I naturally try to read various lines/codes within our conversations ongoing. Needless to say, even in English conversations we have to read them certainly. However, at least from my point, using English people seem to start connecting themselves to the global oneness/union in this world. In other words, by using English they can be broadened. However, if this could be true, then how can I keep on keeping this character/personality that has been weaved within the Japanese language in English conversation?
