2022/07/24 English

BGM: John Scofield "A Go Go"

A day off. In the morning, I went to a library and borrowed two of Yoko Tawada's books. I started reading one of them, her "Journal of walking with languages", but I found that Judith had started her room on Clubhouse so I went in. As usual, I read my journal aloud, and we talked about the reading we always do. She asked me how I choose the books I am reading, and I found it was too difficult to answer exactly. I choose my books from a Japanese app 'bookmeter' and my friends' tweets, but I mainly follow my inspiration. About Yoko Tawada's books, I had thought that I need to read them 'now'. That's the problem of my hunch or instinct.

I usually read books with music, and I thought that "Journal of walking with languages" suited hip hop as a 'miss matching' so I chose Jungle Brothers. Both of them might have some kind of 'wildness'. Or I might have to say they are 'hybrid'. In Japanese, we have the word 'zatsu(雑)' as 'rough' or 'wild'. But this can't have any positive meanings. I guess that Tawada doesn't believe in the power of the 'beautiful Japanese', but she tries to think deeply about Japanese slang, and 'eats' them as an essence of her literature. I want to express how she is brave with the word 'zatsu', but that might not work as praise.

The opposite word of 'zatsu' must be 'jun(純)', as 'pure'. I remember that the Hatena blog's operators made the word 'jun nikki(純日記)'. The 'pure diary'! It might mean that the action of writing about every day's event must be beautiful. But I want to say that 'zatsu nikki(雑日記)' is also powerful. The toughness of 'zatsu' allows us to eat various events in our everyday life and output as a great journal. I quoted 'zatsu nikki' from Tetsuo Kokawa, a Japanese professor of sociology. As you know, 'hybrid' dogs and cats are really strong. And I also try to make my thoughts as 'being hybrid'.

In the afternoon, I met the leader of my group home. I confessed my worries to him. About the problem of needing any women... Of course, it couldn't be solved from the base. But I could understand that my worries could be sharable with others, or could be understood by others. That was really glad for me. After that, I went to Aeon and controlled my Instagram page with my smartphone, and also read Yoko Tawada's "Exophony". I thought I wanted to read Yoshio Kataoka's essays about English and Japanese, but his "Thinking Japanese by English" was already out of print. Oh my!