Back To Life

Back To Reality

2022/03/18 English

I've finished reading Kazushi Hosaka's "The memory of the season". I had read this book for the first time when I was a college student. I thought that this novel has a serious touch and that is different from his "Plainsong" and "Breakfast on grass". Maybe it's from the reason why the main character has a child. In "Plainsong" and "Breakfast on grass", I can see that they still have the point of view which is naive like college students. Of course, they have to go out of that mood. The characters in Hosaka's novels try to live with the responsibility of becoming adults. That's nice.

I felt "The memory of the season" was comfortable, maybe it was because of their attitude. They aren't afraid of showing their philosophy, in other words, they are trying to be themselves. In this novel, they do high-quality discussions of philosophy. I want to call them symposiums. I want to write that kind of symposium in my novel. But I won't follow Hosaka's manner. I want to express 'my' thought. Why do I live? Why do I learn English? etc. I want to read his "Conversation Piece".

In the morning, I joined Judith's room on Clubhouse and read my journal loud. Judith said to me that I have a 'beautiful mind', and that remained in my mind. I won't say that I have such a beautiful mind. As I always write, I have a nasty or wicked mind so I get confused if I am said that I have such a mind. Probably it also comes from the experiences that I had been said as a creep or weird child in my childhood. I feel sad that I can't accept other people's praise. Do I just have to get used to them?

I still had time so started reading Kenichi Yoshida's "Time". I thought about what Kenichi Yoshida wanted to say or express in this "Time". Probably he didn't want to discuss the theory of time seriously. Of course, I can never tell but I guess that Yoshida wanted to vent the complicated thoughts which can't be kept in himself, so he wrote such a strange and unique theory of time. I can see that a person in the corner of the world tried to think about time, and that theory was not related to Heidegger and Syozo Ohmori. Maybe he tried to save this world by writing this incredible theory of time?