Back To Life

Back To Reality

The First Letter


Dear Marco Stanley Fogg

Hello. How are you doing? How the corona disaster in New York is going on? In Japan, we are worrying about the sixth wave. The meetings I will attend should be the online ones on ZOOM. Marco, this year I will be 46 years old. When I was 20 years old, I read an adventure "Moon Palace" by Paul Auster which you appear as the main character. 26 years passed... what a long way. At that time, I couldn't forecast the era as now would come. Even a lot of ideologues discussed the future of the internet age...

Marco, how old are you now? All I can do to see how you are and what you are doing is just to read the novel "Moon Palace". It was a pity but I don't have any good ability of memory so I can't remember "Moon Palace" well. But it was a very sad, and beautiful story for me. I might have to read "Moon Palace" again to see you again. Reading it again, I can meet you again in that novel. I even might find myself again. The person who had read that novel with a certain passion.

In "Moon Palace", you should be 20 years old. 20... yes, I lived that age. Today was a "coming of age day" in Japan. People praise youth. 20 must be the most beautiful day... they say so. (Paul Nizan was the person who said so? I have never read his works). But it was a terrible era for me when I was 20. There were too many possibilities so I couldn't see what I should choose. I even couldn't see what I would be able to do. So I just felt the pressure.

At my 20, I went to Waseda University. In Japan, almost everyone knows what Waseda is. It must be a famous university as Colombia University you went to. But even I went to such a big university, I felt terrible at that time. Marco, that's youth? I can say this clearly. Now is the happier period for me than my youth. Of course, I lost the possibilities. I can't become what I want. But I can live seriously with a certain responsibility.

From now, I will write about my story, my truth. See you.